How to Survive Two Under Two

For those of you who have, had, or will have two beautiful children under the age of two...I applaud you. It is not for the faint of heart!

We had our son (my first, his second) and  daughter less than two years apart, primarily because my husband and I are only getting older! Unfortunately, this 31-year old body does not have the energy or strength it used to. Not only that, but we were both ready to get past the diaper changing, sleep deprivation, toddler meltdown stage of life. We debated waiting a little longer at one point,  but only because I wanted to drink wine and sit in the hot tub during our family’s Christmas vacation. Long story short, everyone enjoyed the hot tub but me.

I'm only a few short months in and have realized that this, so far, has been one of the toughest seasons of my life. Everyone says "this too shall pass", but dang it...it needs to pass quickly! Thankfully, our daughter is laid back and likes to sleep a lot, but she’s still a newborn and as needy as any newborn would be. Our son on the other hand…he might possibly be my payback kid. I frequently ask my husband if there is something wrong with him. He smiles, being the experienced father that he is, and reminds me that "he's just being two". Except he’s not quite two yet...insert crying emoji here.

If you’re deep in the trenches, remember that you are NOT alone! And you’re not crazy even if you feel like it. Below are my 6 go-to's that help me get through the day with these two crazy kids. I could add plenty more such as keeping the toddler busy with activities, outings, etc., but I feel that calls for an entirely separate blog post (or two!).

1 Pray.  I’ve tried the “get up before the babies” approach, but that has never worked for me…at least not yet. If I get up at 5am, my kids gets up at 5am. If I get up at 4am, they get up at 4am. So, I pray when I can. While I'm nursing, during nap time, or when I turn into the 5-year old version of myself who could not control her temper. I know I can't do this alone and I know he hears my pleas for help. Along the same lines, worship music is a staple in our house. The kids love music and a good dance party...why not use that time to praise Jesus?!

2 Drop all expectations. I never thought I had expectations for my kids, but I realize now that I do. “Maybe tomorrow we’ll make it to breakfast without a tantrum”, “He went to bed late so maybe he'll sleep in", "She hardly napped today so she might sleep through the night". What I thought was me being positive and hopeful was just an expectation I placed on them...how is that fair? I remind myself daily to drop my expectations and take everything as it comes, every day.

3 Choose your battles. I was what you might consider a challenging child (I love you, mom!). I was regularly allowed to wear mismatched clothes and go to church without my hair being brushed (I usually only brushed the top layer...). I always wondered WHY she ever let me go in public like that! My naive younger self told my older self to never let her kids wear pajamas to the grocery store...then I became a mom. Learn to fight for what matters. Let your kids jump in puddles, rub spaghetti sauce in their hair or color on the 20-year old coffee table that's barely standing on it's four legs.

4 Technology. Please, go ahead and judge me, but I've found that allowing my toddler to watch Netflix during his sister’s nursing sessions helps me keep my sanity and him from attacking his little sister (the girl just wants to eat).  I do try to limit it to once or twice a day and he is getting much better at playing quietly and independently during those times! But in all honesty...Word Party, Little Einsteins and I have become the three best friends that anyone could have.

5 Suck it up, buttercup. A few weeks after we brought Emma home, my husband went back to work and my mom left to go home (they were both life-savers as I was recovering from a c-section).  I shared my fear of handling two under two on social media and this is one of the responses I received from a wise former client of mine.  I now repeat this mantra to myself ALL.THE.TIME. Find a quote or mantra you can relate to or that makes you feel like Wonder Woman. Write it down, place it where you can see it and repeat, repeat, repeat.

6 It’s five o’ clock somewhere. I'm hesitant to share this because I don't believe drowning your sorrows in alcohol is the most positive response. However, on more than one occasion I've enjoyed a glass of wine at 10am or a light beer in the early afternoon. It kind of makes me feel like I'm on vacation. Who doesn't love a vacation?!

All that being said, I love my kids and I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm also not an alcoholic...I promise :) So far, I've survived every hard day for the past 31 years. I'm sure I can handle many more!

How do you get through the day with your littles? I'd love to hear more ideas!